I knew I was stuck. But talking about it just wasn’t enough. Body-mind practices helped me break free.
In 2020, I was beyond burnt out. I had just left a summer camp nonprofit that I had founded, my dream since college. For 5 years, I’d given it my all, working nights and weekends while I was full-time teaching in Oakland middle schools. But achieving “my dream” came at the cost of my wellbeing and relationships. And still, I felt like I wasn’t “enough.”
I’d been in traditional talk therapy for nearly a decade, and had lots of insight into my chronic patterns. Nonetheless, I was having conflict at work, with roommates, and even with my boxing coach. I had just had a painful break up, and my best friend told me I needed to change.
But my need to “prove my worth" was deeply ingrained in me. My mind told me that if I just reached a certain level of achievement, then I would feel accepted, enough, and worthy of love. I realized I need to start looking for wisdom elsewhere: my body.
After less than a year of “somatics” — a combination of mindfulness and interactive movement practices — I didn’t feel stuck anymore.
I could feel in my body when I was at capacity, so that I wouldn’t burn out. I trusted this instinct, and made a huge career shift.
I could say “no,” and disappoint people, and stay with the feelings of fear of abandonment that would arise. I ended a toxic relationship.
I could mindfully feel the inadequacy that arose when I was around “impressive” people. I chose to be authentic, even if it was “weird.”
I could identify my needs and communicate them real-time, leading to flourishing of friendships, healthier family relationships, and satisfying romantic partnerships.
Breaking these patterns unlocked the freedom to choose what I really wanted from my life, not just what was expected of me. I pursued long-time dreams, like founding a vulnerable masculinity writing project and playing semi-pro basketball, replacing a sense of stuckness and self-criticism, with empowerment and self-compassion.
I truly love getting to share this process with my clients. The Body-Mind Breakthrough Method was transformative for me, and I get to help clients in workshops and 1:1 each week with deep issues like:
Life transitions, including divorce, engagement, pregnancy, gender and sexuality exploration
Career moves, including quitting jobs, finding new ones, and taking time off
Breaking relational patterns of codependency, commitment avoidance, competition and scarcity mindsets, consent violations, enmeshment and poor boundaries, and triggers leading to shrinking, anger, or subservience
Transforming personal patterns of harsh inner critics, emotional eating, burn out, intergenerational trauma, numbing and lack of awareness of one’s own needs
Curious how body-mind techniques might help you? Schedule a free call below.
